Embracing the differences of a baby with Down Syndrome

When your baby is diagnosed with Down Syndrome, one of the first things the doctors do is talk about all of the signature Down Syndrome characteristics and differences that your baby will have. They will talk about their almond-shaped eyes that could have sight problems. They will discuss their low set and small ears that are prone to infection and hearing loss. They will mention them having a tongue that is 50% larger making it hard to annunciate. They will say the baby will have a sandal gap toe. You will hear all about their low muscle tone and smaller build that will make it harder to hit milestones. They will also talk about them having a heart that has a 50% chance of abnormalities. 

While all of these characteristics make our babies different than others, instead of seeing them as bad things, we need to embrace our babies' uniqueness and see all the positives of their differences. 

We say that her almond-shaped eyes allow her to see the world in a whole new light. Those beautiful eyes will allow her to have a unique perspective on life than any of us. She will use those almond-shaped eyes to see the good in everyone and look deep into your soul. 

We say that her small and low-set ears will give her a way to hear all the love and encouragement we will give her. She will hear our praises and cheers as she learns and grows. Those tiny little ears will allow her to hear the music that makes her dance like no one is watching. 

We say that her larger-than-average tongue will give her a way to share her story. It will allow her to spread positivity by speaking the word about Down Syndrome to the world. Her tongue will allow her to make her signature silly faces that we all love. 

We say that her sandal gap toe will allow take her wherever she wants to go. It will allow her to dance the night away. It will allow her to ride a bike. It will allow her to walk her own path in life. 

We say that her low muscle tone and smaller build allow us to enjoy the baby stage just a little longer than usual. It allows us to get some of the sweetest, most heart-warming baby snuggles as her body just melts into yours. It allows us to celebrate milestones even more when she reaches them. 

We say that her heart is full of nothing but pure love. It beats happiness, joy and so much love into our lives. 

If only this were the list of characteristics and differences the doctors read to you when you receive a Down Syndrome diagnosis. If only we were encouraged to embrace these things instead of being afraid of them. We are mainly told about the differences but in reality, our babies are much more the same as other kids than they are different. 

They eat the same foods, wear the same clothes, play with the same toys, meet the same milestones (even though it might take them a little longer), dance to the same music, and so much more. 

When people find out that my daughter has Down Syndrome, a lot of the time the first thing they say is “I’m sorry”. This used to crush me when I first announced her diagnosis, it made me feel like it was a bad thing. Now if someone says that to me, I respond with “don’t be sorry, she’s amazing!”

We need to make a change when it comes to discussing Down Syndrome and it starts with a conversation like this.